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Friday, December 1, 2023
[New post] Manning Jack Attack Review: 29th November
JTithers posted: " After crossing the halfway mark last week, Wednesday night marked the start of the pointy end of this edition of Manning Jack Attack, the greatest social bowls tournament between Manning Road and the Canning River, and of course this was the last Spr" JT's Sporting Reviews
After crossing the halfway mark last week, Wednesday night marked the start of the pointy end of this edition of Manning Jack Attack, the greatest social bowls tournament between Manning Road and the Canning River, and of course this was the last Spring edition before the beginning of summer on Friday, and for once the weather was quite pleasant after weeks of copping a howling easterly and temperatures in the high 30s, as the temps hovered around 21 with the sea breeze in, but the big change for the grass players was the humidity was up, so the dreaded dew kicked up and slowed the green right down.
In fact, Wednesday night saw the most mentions of the word 'dew' since the World Cup Final.
On another note, before the night began we did lose the Top Shots on a moment's notice due to unforeseen events, but fortunately that didn't result in any forfeitures because The Jackson 3 were already out for this week due to a mandatory family gathering, so we did have ring-ins organised for them, but ultimately with the reshuffled fixture the Jackson 3 got the night off, so the decision was made that out of fairness to Alex for getting substitutes organised, they would get 2 points.
Thus, with 24 teams on hand, Stop Drop & Bowl (The Top Shots' original opponents) played Verse 1 on Rink 5, and there was no game on Rink 2, which I thought it was quite disappointing because when you subtract The Jackson 3 from Verse 1, you should end up on Rink 2.
The second edition of the Corner to Corner(s) for this season, this time with 2 fewer players due to the loss of the Top Shots and the Jackson 3, and first up, the Grass winner was Rede from the Bowled Guys and Lewis from Bowl Movements:
And the Synthetic winner was Marg from the CDs and Aidan from Salty Bowls:
Well done to all players, especially to Marg because the CD's can't even win a meat raffle at the moment.
The Overall Results
After having nights full of tiebreakers over the last fortnight, the handicapper paid a visit to a few teams in the pointy end, and the results were nothing short of spectacular, because in recent weeks 20 shots would've comfortably secured 1st overall on the night, and on Wednesday night it was only good for 3rd.
In fact, 30 shots would've only been good for 2nd.
Without any further ado, 1st Overall went to Macatac 2 with one of the almightiest arse-kickings ever seen on a Wednesday night, recording a 32-shot win against the Steam Rollers on Synthetic Rink 3, as Dave's no-carb Powerade diet seemed to give him the shits, as did his bowls, starting with a 15-1 win to Macatac 2 in the 1st Set and an 18-0 win in the 2nd Set, and somehow I had a photo of the only end in which the Steam Rollers held shot:
All in all, it was a game that resembled the worst parts of the Bible, minus that bit about Sodom and Gomorrah.
In a much tighter race for 2nd, the silver medal position would go to the Shapes thanks to their +21 shot win against Salty Bowls 2 on Synthetic Rink 4, as Craig and the team got their flavour back after a couple of down weeks, and getting those shots back has seen them rocket back up to 7th place, just 1 spot outside the all-important Top 6 money spots.
One shot behind on +20 shots, 3rd Overall went to the Bowled Guys, as they completed a pair of perfectly matching sets (12-2 12-2) against Ten Pin on Grass Rink 2, and Ten Pin were handicapped already without the presence of Deb, while I would note it was a birthday for Bowled Guys captain Bruce's wife Kaylee, and we gave her a traditional Manning Memorial happy birthday during the results....
A round of applause and a pat on the back for surviving another year.
4th Overall was a bit further back, with 2 teams finishing on 9 shots up with 1 drawn set (Norfolk Enchants & the Bowling Stones), and after a convoluted use of the countback system, 4th place was awarded to the Norfolkers of Norfolk Island, who defeated previously 2nd-placed Ebowla Bad, Ibowla Good 10-1 in the 2nd Set after the 1st Set finished in a 6-6 draw, thanks to Justin of Norfolk Enchants hitting 2 bowls in to send EBIG from 2 up to 4 up on the last end...
And the funnier part was, that 4 wasn't even on a powerplay.
He would atone himself in the 2nd Set by ensuring he didn't even reach the head, thus not whacking any bowls in to give shots away, and it showed on the scoreboard.
For the record, the Bowling Stones took down Salty Bowls 1 12-3 in the 1st Set on Synthetic Rink 7, but had to smuggle in a 7-7 draw on a last end powerplay hold of 1 (Turned into 2) to avoid the tiebreak, and that result has seen the Stones jump up into the extreme fringe of the Top 10, and another result like that next week could get them right into the Top 6 hunt.
Completing the results for Week 4, one of the best games of the night was the game between the Great Bowls of Fire and Rock N Bowl over on Grass Rink 4, which featured another cameo appearance from Todd's mate John in place of Paul Alphabet, and Johnny was a former Division 1 White bowler at Thornlie before he gave the game away a few years back...
Upon hearing this info and seeing John wasn't half bad, Pricey allowed Rock N Bowl to even the playing field by subbing in Adam Mac to lead against John, and it raised the standards of their teammates and created a great contest, with the aggregate finishing level at 10 shots apiece and going to a tiebreak, and in the end the Great Bowls eeked out the shot to get the extra point.
Considering how heavy the green was, this was actually a good head
Moving on, another highlight of the night was the Buffed Helmets 2 against the CD's on Synthetic Rink 6, and the night started with Nat's other half Steve being required to front up for the CD's again, and he tried keeping with the CD's name by wearing a shirt with a cassette on it, so it was the great joke of The Cassettes teaming up with the CDs.
To quote Steve:
"At least I wore my team shirt, why aren't they!"
When it came down to the game, the Buffed Helmets won the 1st Set 6-3, before the CD's dropped Helen as 'Drinks Runner' ahead of the 2nd Set and went on to win it 10-3 to force the tiebreak, and it looked as good as won when Steve was holding all the way down to the last bowl, which was in the hand of Kip from the Buffs, and in front of a baying crowd...
He sat it out clean to get shot, and I'd say the look on the faces of Kip and Marg tell the rest of the story:
"There are no two words to describe it!" - Marg
Finishing off, the residents of Crawshaw Crescent are still right on the cusp of the Top 4 thanks to knocking off Buffed Helmets 1 with a drawn 1st Set and a 9-6 win in the 2nd Set, and above all else the highlight was the return of the Weapon from Wialki, aka team manager Kym Wilko, who returned like a triumphant emperor after travelling to the nether regions of the universe, or as some people around Manning would call it, Beacon.
It's like finding Santa Claus in November
Next up, the game between Macatac 1 and the Unbelievabowls on Grass Rink 3 somehow managed to be one of the last games to finish on Wednesday night, and the fact that the Unbelievabowls managed to even get that game to a tiebreak was a testament to themselves, as the Maccers dominated the 1st Set 8-1, but the Unbelievabowls, with some help from Duncan Mac due to them being short a player, forced the 2nd Set into an arm wrestle and won it 4-3, but the sheer weight of good bowls eventually got the Maccers over the line in the tiebreak.
Who was that idiot making the shadow, I wonder
If you ask me, the Unbelievabowls have demonstrated that if you're going to lose in Jack Attack, make sure you win a set and get the game to a tiebreak - They've now lost their last 2 games, but both have been in tiebreaks to keep them in 4th spot on the ladder, still ahead of Macatac 1 for that matter.
Moving on, Manning Up are back into 2nd spot thanks to a tough straight sets win against Fawesome on the Challenger Avenue carpark, a game that featured some sensational bowls from the Fawesome crew (Especially Steve) that were outdone by the more consistent Manning Up bowls from Trav, Simon and Phil, and the other good news for Manning Up was that team manager Johnny McGinn was able to restart his Jack Attack appearance streak, after he was forced to give last Wednesday night a miss for the first time in 4 years.
The penultimate game to mention was that of the Bowl Movements and This Is How We Roll on Grass Rink 1, a game with big wooden spoon implications due to both teams hanging around the Bottom 4 like bad smells, and it finished with the Bowl Movements winning with a scoreline better suited for Manning Tennis Club, 7-6 6-3, and those 4 points have pretty much ensured Bowl Movements won't be playing off for a toilet roll or a wooden spoon in the final week, while This Is How We Roll are simply thankful that the Top Shots exist.
And the lucky last game of the night that I haven't mentioned yet was the reshuffled game between Stop Drop & Bowl and Verse 1, which was ultimately played on Synthetic Rink 5, and ultimately even after the reshuffles both teams had substitute players, because aunty Sharyn was also missing along with her sister and nephew, but SD&B (With Lisa as the team captain for the night) were more than covered by the two young fellas that could easily be mistaken for Beavis & Butthead, and originally when the Jackson 3 were still due to play, our good friend Ron 'Dymo' Dymock was going to fill-in, but it worked out perfectly that Verse 1 needed a player because Ronni was working at the Foo Fighters concert on Wednesday night, so Dymo played for Verse 1.
Now, I have mentioned in these reports that many years ago, when Dick Van Dyke was a boy, that Dymo, aka Mr Dymock, taught Ronni at Australind High School, a fact we found out about when Ron and Ronni were playing alongside yours truly in the old Trevor Chappells...
For a lack of a better word, the teacher had replaced the student.
All in all, it turned out to be a decent contest, as the 1st Set was won by a narrow 4-2 margin to SD&B, as both teams stymied the powerplays, then Verse 1 got ahold of the 2nd Set to run away and win it 8-2 as the boys lost their radar, but the tiebreak was turned around in style as Stop Drop & Bowl got the point, capped when Lisa triumphantly held 2 fingers aloft, and I think the cause of Dymo's down performance in that tiebreak was due to him knowing he wasn't going to get $5 for winning, as he has done against myself and Half Price on Tuesdays for years.
Thank goodness, am I done yet?
Results
Grass 1: Bowl Movements (4pts +4) defeated This Is How We Roll, 7-6 6-3
Synthetic 8: Manning Up (4pts +6) defeated Fawesome, 5-1 6-4
Ladder
Captain's Comments
Wilko, Crawshaw CC: "The vicious rumour about a wrong bias is exactly that, the gutter rushed out to greet my bowl, and I was only trying to lure them into a false sense of security."
"As Mick Malthouse would say, a win is a win is a win."
Kip, Buffed Helmets: "Scotty's put us away for the Foo Fighters… Carry reckons it was a well-timed break because he's had the yips."
Di, Macatac 2: "We apologise to the Steam Rollers, the scoreboard did not reflect the game, they were very unlucky, lovely people."
Todd Great Bowls: "Given the other team didn't have high hopes, it was a great game, fill-ins on both sides, it wasn't like one of us was winning by 30 shots, a good tight contest."
Bruce, Bowled Guys: "Good win on Kaylee's birthday."
Quinny, Norfolk Enchants: "Justin managed to hit 2 of the opposition's bowls onto the jack on the last bloody end to cost us the set win - 6-2 up to 6-6…. He redeemed himself next set."
Steph, Steam Rollers: "Dave's no carb Powerade diet has backfired on him.. the other problem was we all bowled like crap and his bowls weren't much better."
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